Monday, 12 January 2015

"Is it hard work being a Mummy?"

While rushing (as usual) to get out the front door with three kids in toe, Little D asked me to tie his shoe laces for him.  As I knelt down to tie them I could feel him looking at me, his little mind ticking over. Then came this,

"Is it hard work being a Mummy?"

I was taken aback. Had I sighed? Rolled my eyes when he asked me to tie his laces? I don't think so. I felt a little sad.  Hard work or not, I don't want my children to see it that way.

I love being a Mum, ever since I was little that's always been part of my grand plan. But as any mother would tell you,
it is hard. It's physically hard and emotionally hard. It's all-consuming, powerful, stressful, wonderful, tiring and quite simply the best thing that has ever happened to me. 

My husband and I adore our children but we also look forward to our 5 minutes every day so we can actually talk to each other. Not to mention being able to have a shower without an audience or being able to eat sitting down. And just when you think you have it all figured out and that you have this 'Mummy Thing' down, something crops up that completely throws you and gets you back on your toes trying not to drop any juggling balls.

There's always lots of talk about finding a balance when you are a parent. I talk about it a lot myself. You feel pulled in so many directions and sometimes you just need to do something for yourself once in a while. It's important to dedicate time to everything in life that makes you happy and fulfils you but on the other hand, I don't see how you can have true balance when you also have children. There is nothing in this world that would balance the other side of a scales if I put my family on one side. I am all for 'Me Time' and not losing yourself in a sea of nappies, lunch boxes or homework and if an opportunity arises for some Me Time, you should take it. But I am also all for dedicating as much of myself as possible to these three little people who need me more than I realise.

These years are so short and precious. Their minds are so inquisitive and their hearts are so full of innocent, unconditional love. Everything is important to them, even what we see as the small stuff - to them it's big. They need our ears, our eyes, our hearts and our voices - they need all of us.

So, is it hard being a Mummy? Of course it is! We feel responsible, we feel guilty and we often feel like we are being assessed on a daily basis by everyone around us.

But nothing good ever came easy. And being a Mummy is not just good, it's wonderful.

While he sat there patiently waiting for me to answer, his big brown eyes searching my face for clues, I smiled and said "It's wonderful being a Mummy and I wouldn't want to be anything else."
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14 comments:

  1. What a gorgeous post Xandi! It's funny because I was having a similar sort of conversation with one of my best friends in Australia over chat the other day. I've been having a lot of behaviour issues with my eldest, and in addition we are potty training our toddler, all while baby boy decided he didn't want to sleep more than an hour at a time... yes it's bloody hard, but I still would not swap my life if I got the chance to. As you said these days are over in the blink of an eye, and I'm sure over time even the days that seem the most challenging right now will fade from our memories xx

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  2. Yes you are right it is hard but so rewarding being a Mummy, but now my children have left home
    I can see I needed them as much as they needed me! xo

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  3. Just beautiful, motherhood is the most incredible gift, nothing compares to it for me. Yes it can be challenging but my kids are my world. Thanks for sharing this beautiful post x

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  4. So thoughtful and reflective Xandi. It really made me stop, think and appreciate all I have in my beautiful family. I completely agree with you - it all goes by so fast. I still can't quite believe how quickly my daughter has gone from a tiny baby to being a proper little girl at just 3 years old. Katie

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  5. What a great post! Sometimes I do sigh or roll my eyes- I am going to try and stop that right now. #PoCoLo

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  6. I love this post. Now that both my boys are at school and I can see they need me less and less I'm beginning to miss those times when I had to do everything for them. Yes I get time to myself these days but at the expense of feeling needed. I love my boys and although they drive me mad (most days) I too wouldn't want to be anything but their mum. #PoCoLo

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  7. Lovely post and so true, it's wonderful, as well all the other things you said. Good to reflect on how wonderful it is. #PoCoLo

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  8. Really lovely post. Time is the most precious gift we can give our children. Although there are days when I need to remind myself this! #PoCoLo

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  9. Balance is such an elusive thing to find both as a parent as an individual. I love your son's question - small kids ask the most perceptive questions sometimes, don't they?

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  10. A really great post. Being a Mummy is the hardest but most rewarding job in the world. Thank you for linking to #PoCoLo x

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  11. Wow what an innocent but hard question to answer. If my son would say this I would say yes but rewarding as well. =) #pocolo

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  12. Well, on a good day, I'd like to feel I'd think like that; and answer like that...
    Right now, home alone with 3 for a week; exhausted; depleted; honestly, I'm not even sure I'd have had the peace of mind to even start thinking it through...

    Is it hard work being a mummy: YES! Sometimes it is ...And sometimes it's the easiest thing in the world.

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  13. I really love this post. It is so true, and so beautifully written. I am so glad I found your blog! xx

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